Didactic Memorialization and Telling a "True" Story of War

The military is a very controversial topic. Upon reviewing the topic during HumCore I've realized what a sexist environment it holds.

The Invisible War was an incredibly emotional eye-opener for me. The stories these women told settled in me and it emotionally drained me. Some of them being army families, sexual assault being the furthest from their mind because it was just a tradition to be part of the military for them.

"A female U.S. soldier in a combat zone is more likely to be raped by a fellow soldier than killed by enemy fire. In fact, The Department of Defense estimates that in 2010 alone, there were more than 19,000 violent sex crimes in the U.S. military."

Before seeing this, I had known of the minimal attempts of sexism in the military. The military ads, for example, have definitely improved through the years and through the notion of permitting women to join the military.

Women are not nearly as credited for as much as they should be. Women in the military should be the definition of "Army Strong".

Women day-to-day are given the short end of any stick, but the fact that there are women willing to join the military, some knowing their odds/statistics are revolutionary. They hold pride in themselves and belief in what they do.

                               FEMME AIN'T FRAIL

Sources: Femme Ain't Frail, US Navy AD, I Hit Like A Girl, The Invisible War

The Run of This Course

I didn't know what to expect going into my first year of Humanities Core. All I had ever heard was how difficult it was and how time consuming it was - which was very true.

The theme was war and all I could think of was how horrible I was at history and how much more difficult this course would be for me. When I went to lectures I realized how much I didn't know/hadn't learned in high school.

It challenged me in a lot of ways and it made me uncomfortable, which is what college is supposed to be and supposed to do.

I think the hardest quarter for me was this quarter. We talked about sexual assault and sexual violence, and this topic was very uncomfortable, but, like the rest of Humanities Core, was very eye-opening.

Throughout history I had already known that women have been given the shorter end of everything and were always looked down on by men, I even knew about the disadvantages they faced when going into the military, but after watching The Invisible War it changed my perspective on the military and who is in it.

As this course continues and comes close to its end, I have reflected time and time again on the experience and what I have learned, and though it was trying and tiring, I would like to relive it. Just for the challenge.

Research Project

The topic, or artifact, that I've chosen is war folktales. Since the theme of Gender and Sexuality interests me, I think I want to focus on the different roles gender plays in war folktales, mostly within the Civil War if I am able to gather that.

However, if I fail to find these roles, I will most likely just focus on the impact these folktales had on the war.

Stories, I feel, shape the way we view certain things. When we hear a story from one perspective it can alter our opinion or view on that subject. In regards to a subject as sensitive as war, where there are more than enough opinions on it, I think it's important to know every thought on war. Not to shape our own views, but to understand someone else's. I feel accepting opinions allows us to understand the history we both have and haven't lived through more.

This research will definitely be a struggle. It'll be hard to find enough to talk about the specific wars I've chosen rather than just talk about folktales' effect as a whole.

But, it's something I feel passionate about, so I'm hopeful that my drive will make it less dreadful.

Military Culture or Folklore

Tattoos are symbolic to a lot of people. You can get a name on your wrist, a quote from your favorite movie or book on your forearm, or even just a symbol that means something to you. Tattoos are a form of art and expression, valuable to each person in a different way.

“They’re asserting an individualistic identity,” (Anna Felicity Friedman, NY Times).

Military men hold no exception to this rule. In fact, receiving them might mean more to them than to other people. With them being forced to leave everything they have and love behind to devote themselves to the military, the ink on their arms grows more symbolically than people, even themselves, may realize.

Since tattoos can hold such an importance, it's sad to see a ban on getting inked. Of course, if the tattoo is deemed offensive it should not be tolerated, especially with men of such a high position, no matter what military branch or ranking you're apart of. However, the idea that tattoos label you with a certain stereotype should not be encouraged.

By stating that the tattoo ban is to maintain a uniform look only encourages the idea that having tattoos automatically makes you a person with a [negative] agenda. Because people in the military already represent a sacrifice, there shouldn't be a debate on whether or not a tattoo determines who they are as a person.

Lost in Life

Conducting the interview was fairly difficult. My uncle had just been released from the hospital and I worried I would have to search for another subject, not wanting him to feel obligated to do this is he weren't 100% up to it. But, nonetheless and nothing less than the trooper he once was and still is, he promised he felt fit to endure whatever I had in store for him.

My uncle had always been a private man, his exterior is hard and his voice is chilling. He dislikes a spotlight on him and often avoids coming to contact with people in general. Which is why I was so surprised to hear a tint of excitement in his voice when I asked if he would be my interview subject.

When I asked my mom if anyone in the family (besides my uncle) had had any link to a war, and her response was to ask my uncle, I felt defeated. He's not gong to want to talk to me, that was the only thought that clouded my mind.

I walked into the small Mexican-style home, dreading the next hour as I sat in the chair that was placed in front of my uncle in his wheelchair. I prepared to receive little to no information and be out of there in at least thirty minutes, but, when he began speaking about the war - something he was so passionate about - he couldn't stop. An hour turned into two and a half, and there was no room to complain.

I had never been one to enjoy war, even war stories for that matter, but hearing from someone who served so whole heartedly made me wish I could write his story for the world to read.

He found himself in this war, which is why I am choosing to tell his story as narrative. Facing his troubles and obstacles only pushed him to find it in himself to have strength, to have enough faith in himself to make it back home, so he would be able to tell this exact story.

How He Met My Mother

They met at work, a poultry company, while my mom was still involved with my biological father, but were nothing but colleagues until my parents split and he asked her out a couple of months later.

This is the story I got when I asked my mom how she met my step-dad. This, of course, gave me nothing I hadn't already known. So, for a while, I decided to leave it alone.

When I first read the prompt to this story, my main focus was on the suggestion "How They Met", it immediately took me to the show "How I Met Your Mother", which is one of my favorites. It sparked my interest, and I came to the conclusion that if I wanted to know the whole story I'd have to stop going to my mom for the answer. So, I decided to ask my (step-)dad.

I made sure to pull him away from my mom, fearing that he'd look to my mom to retell the story as he so often does with everything else I ask him while she's in the room. I told him I want the full story from the beginning. Had he wanted to approach my mom sooner? What intrigued him about her? She was never an office favorite among the girls, had he heard some of the rumors they had spread about her? Did they change the way he saw her?

It turns out Koen (step-dad/dad) had met my mom way before she could remember. My mother used to have a job, straight out of high school, as a cashier for a restaurant called Pioneer Chicken, my dad worked for Rogers Poultry (a company that delivers poultry to various restaurants, amusement parks, etc.) and he had gone in there a few times to make a delivery. Only glancing at my mom, but never really giving her much thought, considering he was already (unhappily) married with children. Little did he know that he'd be working in the same building just a few years later.

But, before they had started working at the same company together, my mom worked for a company that my dads job shipped to/did business with. My dad still worked for Rogers Poultry and before my mom worked there with him, she worked at another distributer named Canyon as the receptionist. He had seen her and thought she was cute, but much too young, so he decided to leave it as business and continue on his way. His marriage was in shambles, as he likes to say.

A couple of years later and my mom is sitting front desk at Rogers Poultry, having been a victim of in-office bullying, having to deal with a domestically violent relationship and four kids. My mom's baggage was heavy, but Koen saw passed that. He saw a strong woman who was having trouble getting over a few bumps.

After my moms separation with my biological father (he was much too controlling and verbally abusive to both of us, having scared us much too often), she began her rode to recovery, and a few months later allowed Koen to take her out.

It took me two years to warm up to the thought of my mom being with someone else, but almost seventeen years and an eleven year old daughter later, they're still as strong and beautiful as ever.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how Koen met my mother.

Fact: Men Experience Sexual Harassment Too

Throughout the course I have tried to relate all of my topics centered on the theme of sexuality and gender in war, and one thing that came to mind while determining how to end this post was our lecture in torture, this picture in particular:

*sensitive content below*

Sexual harassment is often something associated with women, we seem to ignore the fact that men can be victims of this source of abuse as well, let alone it is never assumed that a woman is performing this type of torment.  

It was shocking to me to see this photo, only because I would have never thought a woman would perform in an action that is too often performed on women themselves. Terrorism is too often limited to physical acts and are never linked to emotional trauma.

Elaine Scarry says that “sexuality” is a source of power, asserting a certain dominance allows someone to believe their power has enhanced. In Professor Lazo’s lecture on Barbarians and barbarianism there are recorded accounts of men who were tormented through sexual assault/harassment and describe what has happened to them.

It was also alarming how shocked I was that I had never heard of this treatment before. Sexual harassment toward men is so rarely talked about that it’s extremely difficult to comprehend that it actually happens, and in a way that is traumatizing, in the same way it happens to women.

I believe that this is a “gender norm”, or a socially constructed idea, that men cannot experience sexual assault. Men are portrayed as too masculine and are labeled with stereotypes that contradicts the idea that they can be a target of assault.

It’s disappointing that issues that happen every day and can happen at any moment are overlooked because of certain stereotypes or because society sees them as a non-normality.